Does your passion burn with a big quick fire, or a small long one?

My passion for the ocean is deep. Deeper than any dive I will ever make. It’s like a slow burning fire that is always inside me. Seeing a photo of the sea, a shark, fish or just hearing the sound of water or the silence of the sea – it makes me want to go there. Just as if I see a beautiful mountain I feel a need to be there. That’s like adding wood to the fire, making it’s flames higher, giving more energy.
Passion is a fire that gives energy. You can keep feeding it with bits and pieces to keep it burning. But you’d also better watch out so not too much other things catch fire and burn out next to the fire.
How does your passion work?
Last year I had a enormous fire of passion for deep freediving. It was so big, and so much was fed into the fire. But eventually it burned out. I tried to light it back up, but it wouldn’t. Maybe I didn’t have enough wood to feed the fire. I will not do any more freediving competitions or big record attempts this year. It’s ok now. Though at first it was aggressive, a big thing to be ”finished” for the year. But I have taken several years off from deep dives before. It’s not by far the end of the world. My identity is not only being a freediver. Other things caught the fire of passion; sharks, conservatism, training, climbing, photography, writing, new ideas. New priorities.
Not much lasts forever. Change is truly the only constant. What is important to you will also change. I had big difficulties thinking a freediving competition or record was important when one of my favourite countries, Nepal, was in so much pain. Several times I just wanted to go there and help. But I can’t really do anything good right now than to support them economically. I wish I had some competence to help in emergency relief situations. I hope to go later and maybe I can help to build houses or something. Does any of you know any education or course I can do?
So what do I do now.
I land in a state of in-between. In between travels. In between adventures. Work. Training. Family. Friends. It’s ok. It’s a good place to land.